Mixing of the Ashes, July 16, 2015

Wednesday, July 16, 2015…… the day we placed Mom and Dad’s ashes under the oak tree at the cabin.

It was a lovely day. Puffy white clouds in the blue sky and the wind ruffling the water of Bottle Bay into whitecaps. Dave, Kirsten, Amanda, Rebecca, Donna, Timothy, Jane and Douglas gathered at 11:30 on the beach by the tree for the event. As Jeff and Paula were up next door, they were invited and did come too.

David lifted the rocks to reveal the box of Dad’s ashes placed there in 2009. We opened that box and the similar box of Mom’s ashes and set them side by side near the hole at the base of Mom’s oak tree.

Dave read the poem Rebecca had written about the tree (15 years ago) and everybody was offered the opportunity to say something if they wanted. I spoke of Mom’s fondest last wish that the family would be reunited and that perhaps today is the beginning of that reunion. I could not hold back the tears.

We each took turns using a big spoon to dip a scoop of each into the hole. Amanda did a scoop for Mathew. I did an extra scoop for Benjamin. It was hard to hold the tears.

Then as there was a cavity between the ashes and the “topping rock” Doug and Dave scooped a bucket of gravel to fill the hole; then the top rock was placed along with others there that Mom had collected.

We all then stepped out onto the dock and each had the opportunity to dip a spoonful and cast it into the lake. Mom’s spread into the wind; Dad’s was rather clumped and splatted, making an eerie ghost-like perpendicular shape in the water.

The remaining ashes were saved to incorporate into the next concrete mixing that needs doing.

As we finished up, David noticed that in the bush by the boathouse door there was a Yellow Warbler.

Was that Mom come to say “good job?”

Then we all had a group lunch dragging chairs to the round table on the beach.